I tried walking into on-coming traffic and that didn't work.

I don't have the energy for anything else right now. I don't have the energy to climb back out onto the ledge like I did after the Maryland game. I don't have the tears to weep like I did after the Boston College game. I am spent.

This is the second year in a row that we've been one win away from the ACC Championship. This is the second year in a row that we've played like the best team in our half of the conference, and yet did not represent our half in the big game. This is the second year in a row that we are less than a touchdown away from being a top ten team. This is the fifteenth year in a row we will not finish with ten wins in a season. This is the first time in five years I've had to deal with losing to USC. This is the first time in a long time that I've been disappointed with 8-4.

Who's fault is it? Though his stats look good, our QB has been less than effective. The ACCs leading rusher and one of the top scorers in the nation has been MIA the last few weeks. The fifth best defense in the country was as ineffective as the French military. The refs made a couple questionable calls. For the second time this season, our offensive coordinator has taken the "hot hand" out of the ball game for someone cold off the bench. Our kicker missed yet another field goal, this time it wasn't blocked, just straight up missed it. And for the third time this year, I have to live with the fact that one just got away. One we could've won. One that we should've won. One we just let go.

We lack something. What it is is hard to say. You could call it "the killer instinct." That ability that all good teams have to drive that hot dagger into your heart to reassure, as if you thought different, that you were definitely going to lose today, and that it would be painful. We can't put teams away. We jumped out to a fourteen point lead in the third quarter. That's what good teams do. They score. But great teams, truly special teams, come again, with back breaking force, to take the life out of the other bench. That is what we can't do. We can never make the other team believe they're beaten. In the end, it just looked like they wanted it more. The game was in our hands, and instead of putting the shoulder down and running over someone, we fumbled it away.

So I don't care anymore. I don't care what our record is. I don't care who wins the ACC. I don't care who wins the National Championship. I don't care what bowl we go to. I don't care if we win the bowl. I don't care who we get commitments from before signing day. I don't care that the program is heading in the right direction. I don't care if I'm "learning fast for only being here three months." I don't care if the Democrats take control of Congress. I don't care if there's a Mormon running for president. I don't care if the Pope is coming, the Pope is coming. I don't care if it's two in the morning and I'm ranting blindly into a blog that will be viewed by friends all over the world. I just don't care. I'm tired. I'm tired of being 'that' team. 'That team' that lost 4 games last year by a combined 12 points. 'That team' that lost 3 games this year by a combined 5 points. 'That team' that has been one win away from the ACC Championship game two years in a row. We've been 'that team' for too long, and I'm tired.

I'm sorry Reggie. I know you wanted it. I wanted you to have it. I was angry when they took you out too. You deserved it. You deserved better. Thanks for everything. This one's for you.