Sin and It's Consequences

Most days I read my Bible and pray. I am conscious of God and interact with him. I try to live righteously. I try to repent when I fail. I tell other people about the truth that I have found. I show grace whenever I can. Most days I try to live my life in worship.

Then other days, I do worship. I don't just do the things that look like worship, I worship. I don't just look for God, I look at him. I don't just think about glory, I get a glimpse of it. I don't just ask for forgiveness, I weep over my sins.

Today is that other day. I went to church like I do every week. I talked to the same people I do every week. We talked about the same things we do every week. We started out singing the same songs we have sung before. But there was something different today.

We sang and clapped and danced today and we did it all with a joy that I have not seen in the church since being here. There is no other explanation I can offer, except that the Spirit of the Living God moved today like he has not done in that church in my short time here. At first it felt great, overwhelming me with joy, until something happened. As I prayed, I became overwhelmed with another thought, the thought of my sin. It all came rushing back to me as I prayed, all the things I have sinned in and even some of the things I thought I had "repented" of. It flooded me with horror and disgust. Here I was, in the presence of the King of Kings, standing before him in my filthy rags. I felt, more than I have ever before in my life, that not only had I DONE a lot of bad things, but that I AM bad. These sins that were brought to rememberance were not merely actions or thoughts of mine, this was me. It is who I am. And all that I am, when it was contrasted with the beauty of Christ, broke my heart. All I could do cry. Cry, and ask God to forgive me.

And if that is where things ended, I should be pitied indeed. If all we could do when faced with our sins is to wallow in them, we would all be mired in our own filth. But praise be to God that that's not where we are left. When the thoughts of my sin flood me and move me to tears, I cry out for forgiveness and I have been heard. There was a man named Jesus who lived a sinless life and died a horrible death, offering himself up as a sacrifice for many, that we may find that forgiveness, and enter in to fellowship with our God. There is grace and there is mercy. And it overflows from the cup of our Father. With the blood of his Son, we have been washed clean. And with the fire of his Spirit, we have new life breathed into us.

So there is hope. Sin has dire consequences. We all feel the effects of it, in our sicknesses, and pain, and heartache. But there is a greater penalty that must be paid. There is a firey wrath that must be quenched. His Holiness must be revenged. Praise be to Christ, who stood in our place, and took the sentence that we had earned so that we could go free. He was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all. -Is. 53

After the singing, this was the Scripture that was read. And so I prayed these words for myself, and I pray them for all of you, "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have broken rejoice. Hide your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities. Creat in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit." -Ps. 51. Amen.